Photo 1: Justin, 12; Christopher, 8: How many more years will I be able to whoop these guys?
Well, it's that time again. Once again, my opinion counts for something. Oh sure, I get to boss my kids around whenever I get the urge (I'm not sure how much longer I will be able to do this, see the picture below). This is a

Simon Cowell type of power. The disappointing part was that there were no William Hungs for me to humiliate. The mental damage left after years of kissing the butts of arrogant builders and subs with second-grade mentalities is festering just below the surface of my psyche. It's my turn to have the power: I get to judge the efforts of your creativity or lack thereof.

I must admit, this is an ego-boosting exercise for a former drywall dog. However, we were a bit disappointed by the participation of the readers. It can only be surmised you are all busy rolling through gravy jobs and raking in the big bucks. You must be spending so much time at the bank making deposits you just didn't have the time. Or no one reads this article anymore and could care less. I hope my first guess is correct.

This year, the magazine-in the hopes of getting you out of that chair and into creative mode-has loosened up those rusty hinges on the company safe with WD-40 and sprung for a few Gonzo AiD shirts. This year's winners will be rewarded with these newly printed goodies. Onto the results:

Photo 2: The Greatest American Drywall Hero, Kevin Strauslin.
First Prize for the most creative use of computer technology goes to Kevin Strauslin Drywall and Construction. Can you say "Greatest American Hero?" Kevin and his wife, Susan (the designer), hail from Oakland, Ore. If you want to check out some of Kevin's handywork, go to www.kevinsdrywall.com. Nice work, dude. I expect the Gonzo shirt to be worn at least once on one of your jobs before you enshrine it to your trophy case.

Photo 3: Too much testosterone?
Dietrich wins the award for promoting the wearers of the company's shirts to be manly men. We all know the wall trades are the biggest studs on the job, but now they can advertise this fact by wearing Dietrich's submission. You guys get one Gonzo shirt. I suggest you have a contest within the ranks of your company to determine who is the biggest stud. This person will be the winner of the coveted Gonzo shirt.

Photo 4: How about sending me a shirt instead of a picture?

Fun, fun, fun

Once again, the folks at Stockton Products dare us to go to work and not go party. I'm sure the designer is a Parrot Head. Wearing this shirt literally cries out, "It's five-o-clock somewhere." Oh by the way, if you want a Gonzo shirt, how's about sending me one of yours instead of just a picture? I need XXXL in case you haven't looked at my picture. Thanks for being a regular contributor.

Photo 5: Let the good times roll.
Kelly Plastering keeps the tradition alive by promoting overindulgence. And we wonder why people think everyone in the wall trades like to drink? Once again, thanks for being traditional. Expect your shirt soon (you may have to leave the bar to check your mailbox).

Photo 6: Look for the Red Tail on the bike trails.
Scott Fyfe sent in his latest version of the Red Tail shirt. Scott is a great guy and has been very helpful a time or two. Here is your payback. For anyone who doesn't know about his tool, go to www.redtailtexturegun.com. I expect you to wear Gonzo the next time you go mountain biking.

Photo 7: Rob Bush for President.
Last but not least: I award my Brother Rob Bush the best overall design for his artwork on Gonzo. We spent three hours one day on the phone and fax. He would send me what I was trying to describe and he would put it on paper. It took four tries to get to the final dog. I like it. Along with my verbiage, I predict the Drywall Dogg shirt will become a much sought after collectable. It is a limited run, so the next time I ask for participation, hopefully it will be an incentive.

Until next time, remember: every dogg has his day.